Ya Allah , Thank You So Much

It's time to bid farewell
To these lovely days here that I can't mention well;
Yes it was those wonderful years
Which I will cherish for reasons none can understand in years.
Yes, this place is to me like mount cave Hira
Where loneliness descended like an era!
And the revelation came to me when least expecting!
I was surrounded by stagnant feelings
Like our beloved prophet (pubh) surrounded by non believers!
It was here I was forced by the command IQRA ,to read as if like believers
By my own inner voice mixed with emotions!
Being a sensitive soul I shivered with fear and tears,
Ran here and there feeling the weight and fall of the mount of sins over my head!
with great difficulty i tried to understand
Quran with its meaning and my wonderful dheen!
All was made easy by His mercy alone!!!

These natural beauties
Taught me the love I forgot to my Lord!
These snows and gentle breeze
Connected me back to my Creator!
The less friends circle added my taqwa,
The less socialization and parties was indeed a realization
It taught me to shed competitions in trivial things,
The less halal shops made me realize
How surrounded and inter twined we are with harams!
The less masjids taught me
How much we ignored Allah's houses when we were surrounded by many!
The less availability of modest dress
taught me the value of hijab!
The less favorite food items
taught us the plenty of things we were misusing!
The frequent travels from countries to countries in air water and land
taught me .....

How Beautiful is Allah,
How Merciful is HE
How Magnificent is HE
How Majestic is HE!
How Loving is HE!
How can I call this land haraam
When it made my soul,body and feelings halaal?
How can I curse this land
When it compelled me to renew my Shahaadah ?
How can I say I hate loneliness
When that alone made me nearer to You my Rab?

From this distant land You invited me to Your House
In that desert area, the holy city Mecca ,
Where I was honored as Your guest!
Even though I was physically near to that blessed spot earlier!
It was from this distant land You put the urge in me to perform
The mini pilgrimage with the reward of the hajj
As Ramadhan was that month!
It was from this distant land You called me to be
Near our Rasool's grave and sent salaams to him(pbuh) and his companions!

Ya Allah, I know all these where your plans !
Plans to mould me, to teach me, to increase in me the sabr, taqwa....!
Now You are beckoning me more close to Your blessed spots;
Taking me from natural beauty to spiritual beauty,
Like a more purified soul!
I wish You love me and guide me like this
By forgiving my sins and shortcomings ya Allah!
I have more to scribble,
But indeed my hand and pen is so weak to carry
The weight of gratitude I have in my heart !!!
But I know You know all those what is said and unsaid!
And I'm in peace as You alone is my best friend and Master!
This is no more a boasting
But a true bidding farewell with full of tears and hope
With full gratitude and sincerity towards my Lord
Who blessed me with all things in my life....
Which I m compelled to scribble
Not like a poetry not like a prose
But like my mixed emotions ....
Let it flow without the boundaries of a genre !